Diversifying

Seems that after some time of being with good guys (they sure had their weaknesses, drugs, alcohol, among others, but they were basically good guys) i got fed up of them, as i said before. So now i am trying to diversify. Find it tough, i must say, because my life is a predictable one, job, park, home... Occasionally supermarket, greengrocer's and herbalist’s shop, or mall for a pair of cute little shoes and maybe even an afternoon snack with lots of chocolate and a glass of milk.

Diversifying has to be done in the shadows of the night, and, for me, nights are as calm and still as the dead sea in winter. And, lately, when i have had the opportunity, i’ve just stayed home eating pop-corn or simply sleeping; gosh, i’m dead! Besides, i don’t feel like sneaking around by myself, looking for a guy that may or may not succeed in being interesting at all... and then i just don’t know how to say NO when it comes to it. I keep thinking no, i won’t give him my phone number, no, i won’t see him again, it’s been nice enough for a night, let’s not spoil it. And then he says hey, i’d like to see you again, Nope (my answer), come on! it was fun, we could just meet some other night, couldn’t we, give me your phone number... And guess what? I do. I did!! More that twice... and what’s more, I still meet one of them from time to time... don't ask me why... yeah, it’s simple, just don’t know how to say NO when it comes to it...

Man is not the only animal that trips twice over the same stone. Women do that, too...

So now that i’m fed up of everything (quite), i have decided to give my life a makeover. Wonder how... I’m on it =) but given that i’m pretty slow at almost everything, i guess i won't achieve anything before i’m forty. Frustrating.

My job is a bill-paying job. In fact, i cannot complain about it. Still, i do. It's fucking boring and i keep saying the same four sentences over and over again... I feel like i have had the same conversation more than two hundred times... Hi, there, how are u doing? Fine, thanks and u? Well, it’s Wednesday, not too bad, is it? Well, it could be worse... Or Good morning, Sir, how are u doing today? Great, and you? Fine, thank you, is your leg behaving? Sure, it's getting better... Or Good morning, how are u? TGIF!!! Yeah! / not too bad for being Monday... But the ones that i prefer are Good morning, may i help u? yes, i'll put you through. Sorry, but lines are busy at the moment, could u please phone a little later or do u want me to leave a message? It sucks.

So if my personal life is a mess and my working life just sucks... I guess that makeover is justified. And mini-crisis...

Somebody asked me the other day, hey! how’s your mini-crisis going? Uh... no, mate, u got it all wrong, it’s not going anywhere. Pretty well established, in fact, thank u.

But diversifying is fun. I like the feeling when i first meet a guy and i look at him and he looks at me and then we smile and say all kind of stupid things and laugh and just behave in a stupid way that can only mean i want sex. Hehe, everything is so obvious and funny...